The Sky Be Blue Everywhere

When I was younger I had grand plans to move away from my hometown and find happiness elsewhere. During a trip to Disneyland I put two quarters into a pirate fortune machine. A card popped out with the advice, "A gimbal-jawed mate would have ye sign on for a long voyage. Refuse it ... yer best interest lies in a snug harbor. Mark well me words: No need to sail around the world to find that the sky be blue everywhere." Disappointed, I stashed the card in a pocket and went about my day.

Years later, I now keep that card in my wallet. I am grateful to have stayed where I was needed and found a wonderful man that I married. More so, I am grateful for the challenges we faced in order to have Jack.

In April 2010 Mike and I found out we were expecting for the first time. The excitement quickly departed once discovering it was ectopic. After a long night in the emergency room, we returned home with heavy hearts and the broken promise of having a baby.

February 2011 we were hopeful again once realizing we were pregnant. After being monitored daily for weeks, praying and wishing for the pregnancy to be positive, we were given the news it was ectopic again. This time the resolution wasn't easy like our previous experience. A few failed attempts to resolve the ectopic eventually caused me to have surgery, lose one tube, have another tube damaged, and receive a blood transfusion.

Although we were told we could never get pregnant, we found out we were expecting again in June 2011. We were terrified to face another series of medical issues. While being examined by an ultra sound tech we heard the words, "And there's your baby." The image on the screen showed a successful pregnancy!

While carrying Jack I had several issues. The blood transfusion received in February had given me antibodies that would attack the baby. As we were coming out of handling that issue, I was diagnosed with preclampsia. We were twenty four weeks along when I was admitted into the hospital for constant monitoring. Twenty five weeks to the day we had Jack.

Since his birth, we've watched Jack make incredible strides. Some days have been harder than others. Though these events can be difficult, it's been humbling to watch other parents go through similar or worse situations in the NICU. After conversing during parent-night meetings, I've felt very blessed for the struggles we've had to face with Jack.

At the time I was too young and short-sighted to really understand the advice my pirate fortune card was offering. The sky is blue everywhere. There are joys and happiness to experience all throughout this earth. However, nowhere can I look and not see someone experiencing a trial. No matter how far I could travel, I would never find a place free of worry.  Even if there was such a place, I'm glad I never found  it. All the worry and work to sustain Jack has been well worth the effort.

Besides, my sky is bright enough right here.